There were armed guards. There was enhanced police protection. Guards and police scanning the rooftops in search of snipers. Scanning the crowd of families looking for terrorists.
I wasn’t in a war zone. I was at a public Hanukkah celebration in Las Cruces, New Mexico. The day after a terrorist attack at a Hanukkah celebration in Sydney, Australia. Before I left, I told Jim that I’d leave the celebration at the first sign of trouble. We both knew that I meant I’d leave when the first bullet struck.
People have been trying to wipe out the Jews for 5786 years. We are still here.
Hanukkah is the celebration of a tiny band of warriors defeating a huge army. A celebration when we threw them out of our temple, cleaned out their gods, and consecrated the temple. When we took back what is ours. The Torah. The right to study Torah. The right to pray. The right to be Jewish. There’s an eternal light in temples that must never be extinguished. Today, that light is electric. Then, the light was oil. But there was only enough oil for one day. Some went off in search of the proper oil. It took them eight days to get the oil and come back to the temple. That one day’s worth of oil lasted eight days.
Hanukkah is when I remember we are still here. We have never been defeated. We survived the Spanish Inquisition. We survived the Holocaust. We survived Hamas and Hezbollah. We survived being shut out of neighborhoods and jobs. My great-great-grandparents lived by the rule of never doing anything in public that would cause someone to think they were Jewish. They lived in secret because they lived beyond the Pale of Settlement. We’ve had setbacks, but we are still here. We have a homeland. Even in the middle of a war, Israel is still the only place on the planet where it’s safe to be a Jew. We are a mighty, tiny group. 0.2% of the world’s population. Since the beginning, we have had to fight for our right to exist.
When was the last time you went to a Christmas party and there were armed guards, extra police scanning the crowd looking for terrorists. Scanning the rooftops looking for snipers. Trying to stop trouble before the first bullet flew.
I went to the farmers market Saturday morning. During the market, terrorists paraded up and down the street. Idiots conned into believing Israel is the enemy chanted globalize the infatada. Let’s look at history. In 2005, Israel pulled out of Gaza. In 2006, the people of Gaza voted to have Hamas run their government. Israel offered Hamas 95% of what Hamas asked for – a result any intelligent negotiator would consider a major win and accept – Hamas refused the offer. On October 7, 2023, Hamas launched an unprovoked attack on Israel. Israel fought back. Per the head of Hamas, the point of the attack was to kill Jews and obliterate Israel.
Students for Justice in Palestine sounds innocent enough. It’s not. It’s a terrorist organization. Their express purpose, according to the people who run the organization, is to kill Jews and obliterate Israel. Yet these people are on college campuses all across the US. Would any college allow an organization whose express purpose is to kill Blacks and obliterate (choose any country in Africa)? Nope.
And so the idiots and terrorists marched down the street. I stood there screaming: Am Yisrael chai! (the people of Israel live) while pumping my fist in the air. I said that the next time I come to the market I’m bring a Super Soaker to fire at these jerks. I was told just don’t do it in front of the market management. As much as I’d love super soaking these people, I think that could be construed as a battery – an illegal act.
Perhaps instead, I’ll just stand I the middle of the street and block the parade. That’s not a crime. I’ll forgo the Super Soaker. Brandishing said Super Soaker can be considered an assault. It will be just me, my walker and my service dog.
I’m afraid. I’m tired of being afraid. Fear sucks.
There’s a new Starbucks in my town. Jim and I decided to visit it. We won’t be back. My drink was fine. Jim’s drink was fine. A man behind the counter was wearing a keffiyeh. That isn’t fine. What if he discovers I’m Jewish? I did an internet search, and a keffiyeh has no religious significance. It is not a requirement of any religion as, for instance, a hijab is. Right now, the only significance is to terrorize Jews.
We attended an outdoor Hanukkah celebration. I didn’t see any security. What if someone starts shooting us because we’re Jewish?
Classes start at New Mexico State University on Wednesday. There’s a Students for Justice in Palestine chapter on campus. Don’t let the name fool you. They have organized attacks on Jewish students on campuses across the country. They advocate killing Jews. They advocate obliterating Israel. No, I don’t know what incredibly stupid person in academic administration decided to allow the chapter on campus and give them a meeting room. This isn’t a free speech issue. This is a keep terrorists off campus issue. Yes, I have let the FBI know about them.
I’m afraid. I refuse to hide, which may be a mistake – the kind of mistake that could cost me my life. For years, I’d spoken out against assault rifles saying it should be illegal to own one. Now, I seriously consider buying a Tav-7. I seriously consider buying Level IV military grade body armor designed to be worn by women.
I wrote and submitted to the court a victim impact statement. This is the statement:
Deborah Lee Thuman
Attorney at Law
PO Box 68
Las Cruces, New Mexico 88004
Re: M-14-202400807
State of New Mexico
V
Jonah Payton Holguin
This is a victim impact statement. I would be present during the July 29, 2024 hearing, but I injured my achilles tendon and I’m having difficulty getting around.
There’s more to this case than would appear from the police report. This is part of an ongoing attack on Jewish students at New Mexico State University.
To fully understand the situation, there needs to be some history provided.
– Israel left Gaza in 2005.
– Hamas, an internationally recognized terrorist group, won a majority of the government seats in the 2006 election.
– Hamas won every government seat in the 2007 election.
– There have been no elections in Gaza since. Hamas stays in power by incarcerating, torturing and murdering anyone who dissents or is suspected of dissenting.
After the October 7, 2023 attack on Israel, the leader of Hamas stated that his purpose in starting a war was to kill Jews and eliminate Israel. He also stated he hoped the other Arab nations would join him. Palestinians have nothing to do with this war although clearly they are caught in the middle.
The Anti-Defamation League, hereinafter ADL, is an organization dedicated to documenting antisemitic attacks in the United States. The ADL has uncovered an email from the Ayatollah Khamenei which states in part: “Yesterday, the Ayatollah Khamenei, the Supreme Leader of Iran, the largest exporter of antisemitic terror in the world, tweeted “Dear university students in the United States of America, this message is an expression of our empathy & solidarity with you.” Not to be outdone, the al-Qaeda senior command issued a statement: “While we support the assassination of the infidel Zionists and the beheading of them, we also appreciate and value the movement of Western demonstrators and sit-in students from Western universities.”
The ADL sent me a link to the following AP article:
“Iran encourages Gaza war protests in US to stoke outrage and distrust, intelligence chief says
FILE – People walk past the Gaza Solidarity Encampment at the University of Pennsylvania in Philadelphia, Tuesday, April 30, 2024. In the wake of pro-Palestinian protesters on college campuses calling for universities to divest from Israel, Pennsylvania’s state Senate on Thursday, June 27, 2024, approved legislation that would block state aid from going to any university that boycotts or divests from Israel. (Monica Herndon/The Philadelphia Inquirer via AP, File)
Read More
WASHINGTON (AP) — The Iranian government is covertly encouraging American protests over Israel’s war against Hamas in Gaza in a bid to stoke outrage ahead of the fall election, the nation’s top intelligence official said Tuesday.
Using social media platforms popular in the U.S., groups linked to Tehran have posed as online activists, encouraged protests and have provided financial support to some protest groups, Director of National Intelligence Avril Haines said in a statement.
“Iran is becoming increasingly aggressive in their foreign influence efforts, seeking to stoke discord and undermine confidence in our democratic institutions,” Haines said.
This effort noted by the top U.S. intelligence official is the latest evidence that America’s adversaries are harnessing the internet to warp domestic debates and widen political divides ahead of the election.
White House press secretary Karine Jean-Pierre said it was important to warn Americans to help them “guard against efforts by foreign powers to take advantage of or coopt their legitimate protest activities.”
She also warned Iran that “meddling in our politics and seeking to stoke division is unacceptable.”
RELATED COVERAGE
In recent years, Iran, Russia and China have all refined their abilities to use online bots and networks of fake social media accounts to amplify divisive debates within the U.S. over immigration, shootings by police, COVID-19, environmental catastrophes, and even Chinese spy balloons.
In most cases, these influence campaigns exploit existing social conflicts, and Haines noted Tuesday that Americans participating in protests over Israel’s conduct in Gaza have a right to express their views. But she said Americans need to know when foreign actors are trying to meddle in domestic American politics.
“Americans who are being targeted by this Iranian campaign may not be aware that they are interacting with or receiving support from a foreign government,” Haines said.
Iran isn’t the only nation seeking to influence American discourse ahead of the 2024 election. During a briefing with reporters Tuesday, intelligence officials said America’s adversaries will look to harness the latest artificial intelligence to dramatically expand the reach and penetration of election misinformation.
The officials — from agencies including the FBI and the Office of the Director of National Intelligence — spoke with reporters on condition of anonymity under ground rules set by the office of the director.
Russia remains the greatest threat, according to the officials, who said the Kremlin is mounting a government-wide effort to spread election disinformation ahead of the 2024 race. Russia has already sought to exploit debates over immigration as part of its strategy to undermine international support for Ukraine.
Russia is also seeking to cover its tracks by laundering its disinformation through supposedly independent news sites and American influencers who may not know they are parroting Russian talking points.
The officials declined to answer directly when asked if Russia preferred a particular presidential candidate but pointedly noted that the country’s preference remained unchanged from prior election cycles, when Russia was assessed by the U.S. intelligence community to have worked to try to get Republican candidate Donald Trump elected.
While China mounted a sprawling disinformation campaign ahead of Taiwan’s recent election, the nation has been more cautious in its use of disinformation targeting Americans this year. Officials said Tuesday that China shows no indication that it will try to influence the presidential race.
China, one official said, doesn’t see a benefit in choosing between candidates who are both seen as trying to curb its power.
Sen. Mark Warner, chairman of the Senate Intelligence Committee, has said the U.S. may be more vulnerable to foreign disinformation this year than it was before the 2020 election. He thanked the intelligence community for holding Tuesday’s briefing as a way to inform the public about the threat.
“Social media, in particular, continues to be a popular vector for foreign covert influence attempts, and our adversaries remain focused on stoking social, racial, and political tensions among Americans,” said Warner, D-Virginia.
Associated Press writer Eric Tucker in Washington contributed to this report.”
I have been the victim of the students camping out claiming to support Palestinians. I was surrounded, terrorized, threatened and physically attacked on May 6, 2024 when I attempted to photograph the encampment. I was approximately 100 yards from the encampment and posed no threat to the students. Jonah Holguin was one of the students who attacked me. He’s also one who called the campus police in an attempt to have me arrested. Although his own video and a video from a security camera installed on a nearby building clearly showed I was no threat to the students and was being attacked by them, the campus police did nothing other than to put my home address in a police report. Body cameral video and any audio recording done by the police officer clearly shows I was promised that my address would be redacted. I knew that was wrong as soon as I heard it. In 30 years as a criminal defense attorney, I never saw a redacted police report. Now, I live in fear that these terrorist wannabes, urged on by documented terrorist organizations will show up at my front door and vandalize my home, and/or injure myself, my husband and my service dog.
These are the same students who occupied the administration building, damaged the building and terrorized the university president.
This is not the first time I was on the receiving end of a hate crime solely because I’m Jewish. I reported the incident to the campus police and provided proof of the crime to them. They did nothing. As a result, I have had to form a safety plan to attend class and I must be armed with bear spray and a stun gun at all times when I’m on campus.
Part of the job of being a judge is to protect the public. This is done at sentencing. While it is the job of the campus police to protect students, they are deliberately not protecting Jewish students. Jonah Holguin didn’t go to class during the encampment. He didn’t go to class while trespassing in the administration building. He doesn’t care about being a student. What his actions clearly show is that he is a violent individual and a danger to every Jewish student on the NMSU campus. Therefore, probation to “allow him to attend classes” would be a corruption of justice. He deserves a jail sentence. I ask that you take a step to protect Jewish students on the NMSU campus by imposing the maximum jail sentence.
Respectfully submitted,
Deborah Lee Thuman
Attorney at Law
Cc: Anti-Defamation League
Jewish On Campus
Chabad House
Unfortunately, this case is before an antisemitic judge. When I submitted a notice of unavailability so I could observe the High Holy Days, this judge made derisive comments in open court. I said I was available to appear on Christmas, but the judge still persisted in making derisive comments. I have no illusions that there will be justice for anyone in this case. Although I do have difficulty getting around, my reason for not being present in court is I do not have the emotional wherewithal to be in the same room with the defendant or to hear yet more antisemitic crap from this judge.
Classes start in a month. I want to take a painting class and a writing class. I’m terrified. I’m terrified that I will be attacked again. I’m terrified I will be the object of yet another hate crime with the perpetrator(s) being protected by an official policy of police inactivity with regard to protecting Jewish students on campus.
I more or less survived last week. I’m still alive – which is a major accomplishment. Last week, I wrote about my sister’s yahrzeit and my emotional fallout. Tuesday evening, I lit a candle and said kaddish.
Meanwhile, I’m seeing more and more the effects of the hate crimes and antisemitism are having on me. I’m back on anti-anxiety med. My stomach hurts. I know I need to sleep but I’m wide awake and watching the clock go from 1 AM, to 2 AM and getting more and more anxious as the hands move around the clock.
Clumping around in a boot designed to make sure I don’t aggravate an injured achilles tendon is causing me to have back, hip and leg pain. I’m cleared to go to the gym provided I avoid any machine that involves using my ankles. Except I’m too depressed to go to the gym. I hate this. I’ve had to go back to the full dose of my antidepressant. Being depressed is depressing which causes me to be more depressed. Depression – the ultimate perpetual motion machine.
I have some choices. I’ve contacted an attorney I know who handles civil rights cases. Apparently he’s not interested in my case because I never heard back. I could go to the State Police and ask them to investigate the campus police, but I doubt it would do any good. I could go to the US Department of Justice and ask for help under Title VI, but dealing with the feds means watching cobwebs grow around my case. I could go to the state attorney general although I’ve dealt with the general counsel for higher education who refused to help me. No one cases that Jewish students aren’t safe on campus. I am afraid of being physically attacked on campus. At least my handicap hangtag lets me park next to the door of the art building.
And I’m having a crisis of religion. Not faith – my faith is solid. It’s my temple that gives me pause. It’s a reform temple, and I fit into Reform Judaism. But the temple is now and has been in financial crisis for several years. The board had decided to arbitrarily raise everyone’s dues. They expect 20% of one’s gross income. Unless you earn $120K or more. Then the board expects 2%. Meanwhile, they are squeezing nickels and dimes out of people. There was a Purim celebration and members were asked to bring hamantaschen – special cookies made for Purim. Then, people were asked to pay $7 per family to get in to the celebration. Bring food then pay to eat it.
The only other temple in town is Chabad House. I like the rabbi. I loved the class I took on medical ethics. The rabbi is actively working with the university president to attempt to ensure Jewish students are safe on campus. My rabbi is doing nothing.
Unfortunately, Chabad is orthodox and I’m not. I dislike the separation of men and women under the theory that women will be a distraction to the men. That comes dangerously close to blame the victim. I dislike the limited role women have in orthodox Judaism. Their role is to have kids and have a dead-end job so the husband can spend his days in the library studying. Just one problem….women’s reproductive organs have an expiration date. So what is this woman with limited education and limited skills supposed to do after she can’t have more children?
So what am I to do? I miss going to services but I can’t tolerate the leave it alone and antisemitism will solve itself attitude the reform temple has. I fought too hard to get an education and to be an equally-paid attorney to give up and not be allowed to fully participate in an orthodox temple.
So here I sit. No temple to go to for services. Not going to the gym because I’m too depressed. Clumping around making me more depressed. Bleah.
Even The NY Times, a notoriously anti-Israel paper, has to admit every so often, that hamas is horrible, they are terrorists and what happened in Israel is horrendous. Still, the paper cranks out endless articles about damage – personal and property – in Gaza and blames Israel. That’s like saying Ukraine is at fault for being invaded by Russia.
After 9/11, the United States blew up two countries, Iraq and Afghanistan. We were given excuses. Rescue Christian missionaries. Find weapons of mass destruction. Make money for Halliburton. But no one blamed the United States for retaliating against a vicious terrorist attack. The United States sent an elite team into Pakistan and killed Osama bin Laden. But all of that is okay. If you believe what the United States has done is permissible and righteous, you can’t criticize Israel for retaliating against a terrorist attack orchestrated by a deranged man who says his purpose is to wipe out Israel and kill Jews.
We’re having a semester break right now. I don’t have to worry about what the hate criminal will do next. I don’t have to wonder if I’m safe on campus. Actually, I never have to wonder that. I’m not safe on campus. I don’t have to worry about surviving a physical attack long enough for the police to arrive. I don’t have to check my pockets to make sure I have my pepper gel and stun gun before getting into the car to drive to school because we’re having a semester break. This more or less calm won’t last. It will disappear the instant I park on campus when. the spring semester starts.
During this uneasy time out, I’m battling bone-crushing depression. I have to force myself to brush my teeth. I have to force myself to take a shower. I have to force myself to put on clean underwear. Every few days, I have to take a double dose of my antidepressant in order to function for a couple days. I can’t keep taking a double dose because after two, or at best three, days, I become a zombie. I have jewelry photographed, but I haven’t found the energy to list the jewelry in my on-line store http://www.DebThumanArt.com. I have two bras half made, but I don’t have the energy to finish them. At least I’m not suicidal, which is the happiest thing I can say.
I’ve been thinking about what I want to paint in the spring semester. Frida Kahlo said she wasn’t a surrealist; she painted her own reality. I’ll be painting my own reality. It won’t be pretty art. My art never is.
This is the sketch for a series of self portraits I want to paint. I have no mouth because no one in academic administration hears me. I’m alone. There is no chapter of Hillel. There is no chapter of Chabad. The Anti-Defamation League is spread so thin, they don’t have the resources to help me. I’m alone, scared, armed and voiceless. I have to decide if I want to keep the painting flat like the sketch, or if I want to give some dimension to the face and shoulders. I’ve been considering making the sketch into a quilt, but I’m so far behind on sewing, I am worried I’d never get it finished.
The hate criminal’s action has infected every aspect of my life. I have severe depression. I have a lack of interest in doing anything. I’m not eating well. I’m not sleeping well. I’ve tried to work out what’s inside of me through art, but it’s not helping.
I reported the hate crime to both the Office of Institutional Equity and the New Mexico State University campus police. I’ve filed reports with: FBI, ADL, Jewish on Campus. I’ve asked at my temple and I’ve asked the Chabad rabbi in Las Cruces; there is no Chabad or Hillel at NMSU. I made a safety plan and discussed the details of my plan with the campus police. I’ve incorporated the suggestion made by campus police into my safety plan. I’m armed at all times when I’m on campus. There has been no arrest and I don’t expect there ever will be an arrest.
I’ve done all the stuff one is supposed to do if one is the recipient of a hate crime. I am not a victim of a hate crime, I’m the recipient of a hate crime. This vile individual does not get to turn me into a victim. I’m alone. I’m afraid. I’m severely depressed. How long does this crap last? When does the emotional impact end? I’ve been a criminal defense attorney for 29 years and I’m utterly unprepared to be the recipient of a hate crime. I’m aware there are victim assistance programs run by local police and the district attorney’s office. They will accompany me to court….except there has been no arrest. They will help me file for a domestic order of protection, except there is no domestic violence and this hate crime did not include violence. They will refer me to the local sexual assault crisis center, except there has been no sexual assault. There is no antisemitism crisis center although there should be.
And so I double up on my antidepressant dose. I cry. I feel frozen. I make weird art.
I don’t know what I will do with the designs I’ve been working on. Print them on fabric? Figure out how to translate them into a painting? Figure out how to turn the designs into stencils?
All I know is I don’t know how to make it stop hurting.
Deb's Art 