23″ Agate necklace.
22″ Rhodochrosite necklace with Swarovski crystals. Swarovski has eliminated their line of crystal beads. Once my stash of Swarovski crystals is gone, I can’t replenish it.
17″ Jasper necklace.
23″ obsidian necklace with Swarovski crystals.
All can be found in my store, Deb Thuman Art http://www.DebThumanArt.com
Frequently, I don’t understand what’s going on inside of me until it comes out of my hand. I’m on the receiving end of a hate crime, and it has infected every part of my life. I took a double dose of antidepressant today, and I’m still depressed.
And so I turned to art. I’ve been playing with text mask in photo editing.
This is what I say.
This is what people hear.
They all say “Please make it stop hurting.” I used a regular font, and a symbol font. The unintelligible one are what I think people hear. Except I don’t think they are hearing anything.
What do I do with all this? Have it printed and turn it into an art quilt? Have it printed and. turn it into a series of art quilts?
I couldn’t bring myself to go to the painting studio on campus this week. I’m feeling better, calmer, and it’s transitory. I’ll be back on campus on Monday. I’m still afraid. I’m still angry. I’m afraid my painting will be ruined by the person who flung the hate crime at me. I’m afraid of being physically attacked by hamas sympathizers.
I don’t like feeling like this.
Meanwhile, someone hacked my website, http://www.DebThumanArt.com. When I checked my site, I got a page warning me that I was about to visit a page full of malware. It took several hours, but I finally got the page fixed. According to Wix, there’s no malware on my page. There is some interesting art on my page and all of it for sale.
I started playing around with a photo I took several months ago.
I was set to get into bed when I looked out the window and saw a big, orange moon setting. I grabbed my camera, went outside without wearing shoes or a jacket, and started shooting.
I’ve been playing with text. Rather than using one of the regular fonts, I started using symbol fonts. This is what you get when you write: LILIL over and over.
This one is Love written over and over.
I just finished ordering proofs of 96 fabric designs. Once the proofs arrive, I’ll be putting the designs into my Spoonflower shop https://www.spoonflower.com/profiles/deb_thuman I finally put the 84 designs that had been sitting and waiting for me into the store.
Am Yisrael Chai!
The people of Israel live!
Hate crimes don’t always include violence, hateful graffiti, or a fire bomb although all of those things constitute a hate crime. Terrorists don’t start with a bomb although they frequently end with a bomb.
I am on the receiving end of a hate crime committed by a woman I strongly suspect is a terrorist. She told me to stop talking when I was speaking about hamas kidnapping an elderly Holocaust victim. Then, she lied, slandered me and attacked my reputation by claiming I said Palestinians are disgusting. I never used the word Palestinian and I never used the word disgusting. My fight isn’t with Palestinians, it’s with hamas – a group the US deemed a terrorist organization in 1997. Palestinians didn’t murder, kidnap, burn alive and decapitate Israelis on October 7, 2023. Hamas did all that. The people of Gaza voted hamas to govern them in 2006. There hasn’t been an election since. I suspect the majority of Palestinians wish hamas had never been voted in.
Although the people at the Office of Institutional Equity – the office New Mexico State University has designated as the proper office to report discrimination – said they didn’t believe the woman’s claims, her slander of me is protected speech. I’ve been an attorney for nearly 30 years. I was a cooperating attorney for the New York Civil Liberties Union for five years. I know slander is definitely not protected speech. Unless it’s anti-Semitism and it happens at NMSU.
Since October 7, 2023, there have been two pro-hamas rallies on campus. I doubt even half the students who participated realized they were supporting hamas. They thought they were supporting Palestinians when they called for the obliteration of Israel. The second rally is strong evidence that hamas is behind these rallies. The rally was held on November 9, 2023. November 9 is the anniversary of kristalnacht when the nazis went on a terror rampage, burned synagogs, destroyed businesses owned by Jews, and wantonly killed Jews. The only reason to schedule that rally on that date was to terrorize Jews.
I suspect the hate criminal is a terrorist. She’s most certainly a hamas sympathizer. If you see something, say something. Great advice. Try finding someone to say something to. I went in search of the FBI office is Las Cruces. I couldn’t find one on google. I walked into the federal court house in Las Cruces, walked up to a federal Marshall, and said: I need to talk to someone about a suspected terrorist. Result? I was sent on a wild goose chase in search of an office that didn’t exist. What should have happened was to have me sit down and then search for someone I could talk to. Has terrorism become so normalized that we no longer respond to threats?
Eventually, I discovered the only FBI office in NM was in Albuquerque – 230 miles north of Las Cruces. I called what was supposed to be the number for the Albuquerque office. After a half hour on hold, I finally got to talk to someone. I was puzzled when the person asked me to spell Las Cruces. That’s when I discovered the Albuquerque office phone number is not answered in Albuquerque but answered in Washington DC.
Arlo Guthrie did a piece about dedicating a song to the FBI. The story line has advice for The Last Guy – no one has it worse than that guy. All he has to do to have some excitement in his life is to bum a dime and call the FBI. “FBI? Yes. I dig Uncle Ho and Chairman Mao and all their friends are coming for dinner. Hang up the phone.” Arlo was wrong; I had it worse than the Last Guy. I couldn’t call the FBI because the FBI doesn’t want to be called.
I’m afraid when I’m on campus. How afraid? I’ve argued before the NM Supreme Court three times – the last time was to save an old man’s life, I’ve worked on death penalty cases, I’ve done more than 120 trials, I’ve got more guts than brains. I’m afraid when I’m on campus. I am armed at all times when I’m on campus and I keep my weapons on my person and not in my backpack. A weapon I can’t reach when I’ve only a few seconds to respond is useless. I have the number for the campus police programmed into my phone. I have a way to call 911 in an emergency by pressing two buttons on my cellphone. I keep my cellphone in my pocket. I have a way to call 911 in an emergency using my Apple Watch. I always wear my Apple Watch.
I had planned on taking another painting class and an astronomy class next semester. Now, I don’t know if it will be safe for me to do that.
This is the schematic for a painting I’m doing.
I’m afraid to work on it during class time because I’m afraid of what the hate criminal will do to my painting or to me. I’m Jewish. I have no protection. I have no freedom of speech even when I’m quoting what legitimate news sources around the world are reporting.
I only have one thing to say. Fuck hamas.
This is a schematic of the painting for my final project in my painting class. It contains a word some people find offensive. As my high school English teacher said, when no other word will do, the offensive word is proper. I tried, but cannot find another word that conveys the same anger that I feel. Not everyone enjoys a post containing that word, so I decided to put a warning on the post.
The blank spots are for kidnapped posters of 2 pre-school age children, one infant, and an antisemitism poster. Those get glued on. The painting will be shown to the class on 12/7/23…..a couple hours before sundown when Hanukkah begins. When I think about it, it’s a fitting time for the “unveiling.”
Depending on how angry I am next month, I may have a photo of the painting printed by Spoonflower on fabric and turn it into an angry quilt. Being on the receiving end of a hate crime has permeated my life. The stress I feel now is the same stress I felt in law school. I’m forgetting things. Today, I made the wrong turn out of the campus parking lot and headed towards the interstate to go home rather than heading to the post office to pick up my mail – and that was after I reminded myself when I turned the car on that I needed to go to the post office. I have a hard time multitasking under the best circumstances, but now I can no more multitask than I can flap my arms and fly. It’s going to be a long time before the #$%*#@*(!!! on campus and the _#$*#@@!!! caused by Hamas ends. I fear the $%(*@*!!! on campus is going to get worse and will become violent. I hate being scared. I hate feeling alone. I especially hate what the hate criminal did to me and the lasting effects of the hate criminal’s actions. I tell myself that what has happened to me is nothing compared to what happened to Jews, and anyone else hitler didn’t like – during the Holocaust but those words don’t reach the fury in my gut.
I’ve finished the embroidery on the quilt top. The original was a painting that was always intended to be a study for the quilt. I’ve done some reworking and tweaking of the design. The piece contains the past, present and future of the Jews. Our traditions come from 5000 years of our history. The stars are our present. The leafs on the tree of life are our future. I embroidered 18 leaves. Hebrew has numbers but no numerals. The number 18 is represented by the Hebrew word for life.
I’m not sure the colors came through on the photos. I used Razzle Dazzle for the tree and the stars. Copper for the stars, a multi-color brown for the tree. The leaves are green embroidery thread.
My art has always been dark. I create about death, suicide, mass shootings, isolation and depression – all the happy stuff. At the moment, my art is even darker. Instead of being just a kick in the gut, it’s now a kick in the gut delivered with a steel-toed boot worn by someone consumed by fury.
Am Yisrael chai!
The people of Israel live!
This post contains a word some people find offensive. There is no other word that expresses what I feel, so the word stays.
I’m working on a post modern painting for my painting class. I’ve figured out what images I want and I’ve done a preliminary layout. I need to look at the arrangement tomorrow to see if I’ve got what I want or if I need to tweak the layout.
The impetus for this painting is my experiences since October 7, 2023. Today, I got an email from the VP of Equity, Diversion and Inclusivity telling me how open and welcoming the NMSU campus is and how we have this wonderful diversion and inclusivity. Here is my response:
What university are you talking about? NMSU doesn’t have inclusivity or diversity. I’m Jewish. Since October 10, 2023, I’ve been on the receiving end of anti-Semitism and a hate crime. I’ve reported this to the Anti-Defamation League and other groups that support Jews on campus and fight anti-Semitism. I reported this to the Office of Institutional Equity.
The university’s response was to tell me to get counseling.
I have to be armed at all times when I’m on campus and I keep my weapons on my person.
I had to make a safety plan in order to attend my painting class.
I’m alone. I’m scared. I’m not going away.
I’m not going to stay quiet while you and others in administration lie to the community about this being a university committed to diversity and inclusion.
Deborah Lee Thuman
Attorney at Law
Am Yisrael Chai
The People of Israel Live
Let the shitstorm begin!
Here’s the preliminary layout and closeups of the images.
The transliteration of the Hebrew is: Am Yisrael Chai. The translation is: The People of Israel Live.
This is a schematic of a eucalyptus leaf. In the early part of the 20th century, Zionists collected money and bought land in Israel. The land was useless swamp. They planted eucalyptus trees to suck up the water thereby draining the swamp and leaving land good for growing crops.
I can’t decide which is worse; kidnapping an infant or decapitating a small child. I need to correct the spelling error.
This one may be a dangerous thing to say, but I’m going to say it anyway.
Remember the poster from the 60’s – You have not converted a man simply because you have silenced him. This woman will not be silenced.
This is the insignia of IDF Special Forces.
Iron Dome destroying hamas rockets.
I wish I were making that up, but I’m not. I kept the email.
I’m aware there are people who find the first word offensive. I find hamas offensive. There was a pro-hamas rally on campus. It was billed as pro-palestinian, but it was really pro-hamas.
A safety plan to attend a painting class. I never thought I’d have to do such a thing.
This is the preliminary layout.
My online store: Deb Thuman Art is here: http://www.DebThumanArt.com
Every time I think I’m over reacting, I realize what happened is worse than I thought. First, I thought the person’s reaction was odd. Then, I realized it was anti-semitism. Then, I discovered the person slandered me. Then I discovered the university views slander as protected speech. It’s not; but I know the attorney who made that decision and I’m not surprised by such a glaring misstatement of law.
22K+ students at NMSU, and I’m the lone Jew. Hillel has no presence on campus. Chabad has no presence on campus. In 44 semesters of continuing education, only twice was there another Jew in my class.
I’m alone.
I’m armed at all times when I’m on campus. I carry pepper gel and a stun gun. I have a safety plan in place. I have the campus police telephone number programmed into my phone.
According to the president of the university, if I’m upset by what’s happening in Israel, I should go to counseling. According to the Office of Institutional Equity, if I’m upset by the hate crime hurled at me, I should go to counseling.
This past Tuesday, I went to the campus police to report that what I thought was odd, rose to the level of a hate crime pursuant to New Mexico law. Knowing I couldn’t manage without Brady, my service dog in training, I took her with me. I had to hug her twice just to get through the day.
After taking to the police, I was so upset about being on the receiving end of a hate crime, I couldn’t eat and could not enjoy the drink I ordered at Starbucks. Brady and I explored the library. Here she is looking at books and searching for the book with the recipes for dog treats.
I had arranged to meet with my painting teacher outside of the painting studio. It was a good plan. Except I had to go into the painting studio to fetch my paintings and the hate criminal was in the painting studio.
The next morning, I woke up and decided the hate criminal had taken all she was going to take away from me and I was taking back my life. The hate criminal isn’t done with me yet. Apparently, she has the mental capacity of a 12-year-old and is doing petty, childish things just to piss me off. I’m doing my best to ignore her. She’s not going away, but neither am I.
My art has changed.
It’s not finished and the painting is on an easel so there’s only so much I can do to eliminate the background.
Also not finished and also still on the easel. Suddenly, I’m painting about being alone, I’m facing evil, and no one is going to help me. I’m trying not to hate Muslims. I’m trying to remember that Muslims are not terrorists and terrorists are not Muslims. Terrorists worship hatred and murder. News organizations have gotten recordings of terrorists’ cell phone calls bragging about murdering Jews on October 7, 2023.
According to the Anti-Defamation League, “Since the October 7th terrorist massacre by Hamas in Israel, we’ve seen a nearly 400 percent increase in antisemitic incidents across the United States.”
The fact that the crap that has happened to me is happening to Jewish students on college campuses across the country doesn’t make me feel better. There’s a new rallying cry at Columbia law school: Fuck Jews.
I’m alone.
I’m scared.
I have only myself to rely on to protect me.
The last time I had this much anxiety, I was studying for the NY bar exam.
Deb's Art 